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Mother's Day can be a really difficult time of year if you're grieving. The news, shops, and social media pages often don't help and can make you feel overwhelmed. All sorts of emotions might be coming up for you every day in the lead up, and that's completely normal.
To help you cope with your emotions and the day itself, Winston's Wish bereavement experts suggest their top tips for coping with Mother's Day this year.
Take a break from social media.
If it's getting too much to see other people posting about their mums then the best thing you can do is to close your apps.
Have a plan so thoughts of the day don't take over.
Deciding not to make plans might actually not be what's best for you this Mother's Day. Some years you might find that helpful, but if not you could make plans with friends or just by yourself - going to a coffee shop, taking a walk, going to the cinema, or calling a friend.
Let go of expectations.
Expecting the day to be a certain way may not help. Try creating new traditions. Maybe that's as above, making plans or deciding what you're going to do for yourself on that day.
Allow yourself to feel.
Look at photos, think of the good times if you can. It's okay to feel happy and think of nice memories. Equally, make the space and allow yourself to feel sad and wallow if you need to. You can't control your emotions and significant days can be different every year.
Do what works for you and not others.
There is no right or wrong thing to do. You might want to do something to remember your mum or you might want to treat it as a normal day. Whatever someone else is doing may not necessarily work for you, try not to compare yourself to others.
Write a card or a letter.
Expressing your feelings through writing may be a way to let some of your emotions be acknowledged. You could create a memory note jar that you add to on every significant day if you want to, or you could write once and rip it up never to be read again.
Reach out to someone.
Choose people you feel comfortable to talk to: friends, family, support services. Give Us A Shout have a 24/7 crisis messenger if things overwhelm you on the day. Text WW to 85258.
Self care.
Whether it's on the day itself or maybe soon after, plan something nice for yourself. You've got this.
If you need to talk, we’re here to listen. You can speak to the Winston’s Wish bereavement team using one of our confidential on-demand services. You can chat with us anonymously if you wish and share whatever you are feeling. Nothing about your grief is off limits. We promise to listen, not judge and can offer advice and guidance if needed. You can speak to us as little or as often as you want.
Click the blue ‘Chat with us’ button at the bottom right of your screen between 8am-8pm, weekdays.
Call us for free on 08088 020 021 between 8am-8pm, weekdays.
If it’s urgent, text WW to 85258 to speak with someone from our trusted partner, Shout. Open 24/7.
If you need to speak to us in a language other than English, we can use interpreters over the phone, and we can use the Relay UK app if you have hearing or speech difficulties.