How grief is shown on screen (films and TV)
Grief is a really common theme in TV, film, books, and more, so why is it such a taboo subject for some people to talk about?
For this piece, we asked some of our Youth Ambassadors to share some of their favourite ways grief has been represented on screen. Scroll down to read about Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy, The Vampire Diaries, and Shrinking.
“Even though there might be 600,000 words in the human language, the world still struggles to find the right ones when someone you love is gone.” - Bridget Jones
‘Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy’ shows us a new side to Bridget Jones who is navigating the challenges of single parenthood, grieving her husband and guiding her children through the loss of their father.
The film gives a very accurate representation of grief, with scenes many of us will be able to relate to, we perhaps might be picturing ourselves in that very moment.
The film offers insights into how to navigate our grief. Some takeaways I noticed were keeping memory boxes filled with items that were your loved ones or remind you of them so you can look through and reminisce, allowing you to feel closer to them. Bridget also writes a letter to Mark, detailing her struggles and love for him. Whilst this may feel bittersweet, it may feel like you are including them in your life without them. Finally, Bridget and her children celebrate anniversaries and birthdays, making them a day of remembrance and a time to share stories and feelings.
Whilst the film, at times, is upsetting, Bridget experiences moments of sorrow but also humour, reminding us that even in our darkest days, moments of happiness will always be there waiting.
- Daisy L, Youth Ambassador
Bereavement is a common theme within television shows, and I didn’t realise this until after I lost someone. The way it is represented isn’t entirely accurate, but when I watched The Vampire Diaries, it felt like someone had translated my thoughts and feelings from my brain onto the screen.
The Vampire Diaries follows a teenage girl called Elena and her younger brother Jeremy who recently lost their parents in a car accident. The opening episodes show how they are both beginning to deal with their grief, albeit in very different ways. Elena starts writing in a diary and becoming a parental figure for her brother. As an older sibling myself, I know what it’s like to take on that extra layer of responsibility in a bid to protect younger siblings, and it meant a lot to me to see that recognised in the show. Jeremy takes a different route, involving illegal substances and acting out to hide how much pain he is in. Jeremy’s way is by no means the right one, but it shows how individualistic grief is and you never know how you will cope with it.
The show also looks at complicated grief and how multiple losses can shape a person. After turning into a vampire, Elena struggles with her heightened emotions and chooses to suppress them. This choice only proves to be problematic as her feelings fester, culminating in an emotional breakdown. The Vampire Diaries also looks at the importance of having good relationships when you’re grieving, with Elena’s friends showing her she doesn’t have to deal with her grief alone.
The Vampire Diaries will always have a special place in my heart, but my main takeaway is that it is important for me to address emotions head on, otherwise my bereavement could feel like it defines me, when instead I’ve allowed it to give me the motivation to live.
- Anonymous Youth Ambassador
The television show ‘Shrinking’, on Apple TV, has a main storyline on the somewhat recent death of Tia, who was the wife of therapist Jimmy, and the mother of Alice. It explores the complicated and strained relationship between Alice and Jimmy, because of their different ways of grieving and the fact that Alice felt as though Jimmy wasn’t there for her when Tia died.
What I especially enjoy about how grief is portrayed in this show is that there are many other storylines throughout, yet grief is always intertwined. This demonstrates how a recent death can have a huge impact on all areas of a person’s life, which reflects my own experience with grief. It also discusses the impact of Tia’s sudden death on a wide range of people, such as Jimmy’s friends, who also knew Tia.
- Natasha, Youth Ambassador
It’s okay to feel affected or even triggered by grief on TV, in films, or other media. Try not to feel embarrassed or weird about feeling a certain way, no two people will experience grief the same. If there is anything you would like to talk to someone about relating to your grief, reach out to Winston’s Wish to receive immediate support on weekdays from 8am to 8pm.
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